Capsized

I fulfilled a promise to my 8 year old yesterday to take her canoeing.  I should have been more cautious, I should have listened to my mother's warning, I should have engaged with my husband more about his trepidation about the adventure, I should have pushed back as I knew it would restrict my time and probably prevent me from getting to Open House for afternoon service. But I didn't heed the warnings or put my agenda first.  I wanted to have an adventure with my 8 year old.  

It seemed easy enough to go down to the old shipyard and put in.  So we went down and dropped in the canoe, put on our life jackets, and climbed into our canoe.  My daughter was so excited. Little waves were hitting the canoe, some lobster fisherman were unloading their traps on a dock a little distance from where we were putting in the canoe. I gave a little push off and we began to paddle.  I realized at once that my daughter didn't have the strength to balance my paddling and the wind instantly challenged my ability to navigate.  We got going a little ways and got pushed over to shallow water where we went aground.  I was able to get us off the ground but found our canoe sent sailing back to shore.  

With great effort, I got us pointed back out and headed toward big buoys where the cormorants were perching.  I watched my daughter lift her oar out to switch sides.  She swayed on her seat just as a big gust caught the canoe broadside.  We rocked one big rock and then over we went.

I will never forget the look of surprise, if not horror on her face as she went butt over teapot into the cold tidal river.  I knew instantly, my only job was to get to her and assure her we would be okay.  I reached for her, put my arm around her and said, "You okay?"  She was a little shaken but okay and her lips were starting to quiver into a pout.  I told her to stay calm for a minute and yelled out to the lobstermen working on their boat.  When I realized they noticed us and were preparing to get their boat over, I told her our job right now was to sing.  As we starting to sing, Down by the Old Mill Stream, she started to giggle and make up words to it that fit our position.  By the time the fisherman got over to us, we were singing and enjoying our adventure.

Everything turned out fine.  He lifted her into his boat and towed me and the canoe back to shore.  When I got to shore I trudged out of the water, shoulders slumped.  The profundity of the events hadn't hit me. I am not sure it has fully hit me even now.  How do we recognize a bad decision before it kills us?  Are we prepared for disaster when it hits?  How do we save our youth, as the boat capsizes without panicking about losing the boat?

I think of Mark 4:40 Jesus said to them, "Why are you afraid? Have you no faith?"